Fitting Fitness into Your Relationship

What happens when you’re into fitness (really finding your groove), and your partner’s just not into it? Or what about when your partner is more of a meathead than you are? How are you fitting fitness into your relationship?

Fitness and relationships have a lot in common.

They both take hard work and perseverance, but are well worth it.

Just like in a relationship, you’ll encounter obstacles on your fitness journey. You might have to get creative to move past them, but as long as you want to, you can always find a way.

A new fitness program, like a new relationship, is full of excitement and potential. It’s when life gets messy that you have to find an answer to the question, “is it worth what it takes to make it stick?”.

There is no single path to fitness or relationship success…what works for you may be different than what works for your neighbor. The path will take turns, and you might have to double back but the goal is to always move forward.

But where does fitness fit into your relationship?

Defining Your Goals

You have fitness and health related goals. Probably more than one. Undoubtedly, your partner does too. It doesn’t matter who you are, how old you are or where you live, every human has at one time wished they could reach some sort of physical goal. Climb the mountain. Play with their children. Dance like they used to. Fit into that favorite pair of pants.

The deepest of those goals are hard to share but if you share them with anyone, it’s with your partner.

Your partner wants you to succeed. When you share your goals with them, you know that they want to support you.

That support, that sharing, starts with sitting down together and talking about your goals together.

Have a distraction-free discussion about what you want. Talk honestly about what you’d like to change, and where you think you can use the most support. Lay it all on the table.

Get invested in each others goals. Find programs and recipes that work for both of you. If your s.o. wants to put on some muscle and you want to lose a few pounds, talk about what that’ll look like when you sit down at the dinner table. Talk about what makes you feel strong and beautiful, and how your partner can help you when you are feel unmotivated or discouraged.

Figuring It Out Together

Here’s a secret: science is science.

Okay that’s not a secret but recognizing the truth in the following statements is sometimes difficult, especially if you are a female in a relationship with a man.

The “best exercises for legs” that work for you partner, will work for you. Squats, dead lifts, hip thrusts, lunges…yes, those big lifts are the best way to build muscle and strength AND create lean, toned legs. Yes, you should pick up those free weights!

The science behind how macros and calories work never changes. Yes, depending on your goals, body type and current shape and fitness level, you have to adjust. But you don’t need to find a meal plan that supports muscle growth and a totally separate meal plan that supports fat loss…you can make one plan work for both of you.

The same words of support and positive affirmations work as well for you as they do for your partner.

What I’m getting at is that no matter what your goals are, get after it together.

Working Out Together

There are major benefits to working out with your other half. You spend more time with each other. You grow together. Exercises boosts endorphins and has been proven to improve your sex drive. Achieving goals, no matter what they are, is hard. You can support each other, help each other through the hard times and through the roughest climbs.

My husband and I bring different skills and strengths to the workout floor. He encourages me to not be scared of the big lifts or the final, shaky reps. He spots my heavy squats and (literally) lifts me up so that I can finish my pull ups. I support him through the longer, faster paced workouts and the want-to-but-don’t-want-to miles we log running when the weather is right.

Talk about what you’re good at and how that could help your partner. Are you a cardio queen and your babe has never stepped foot on the elliptical? Coach him through an interval workout. Is your partner an amateur body builder and even though you’re nervous around the squat rack and you’ve never dead lifted before, he or she could teach you what they love.

It’ll bring you closer together, teach you how to overcome tough spots together, build your confidence and improve the quality of your life, together.

Tips for working out with your partner:

• Schedule a few workouts each week that you can do together. Write out the plan ahead of time so you know where you can help each other the most.
• Take turns choosing exercises. You choose lunges, your partner chooses bicep curls, and so on.
• Superset exercises so that if you need to switch weights on a barbell, you have time.
• Watch each others form to encourage and correct (nicely).

Working Out On Your Own

As great as a partner workout can be, it can be important to get in your own workout, with your own playlist and at your own pace too. I love exercising with my husband but I know that we both enjoy our solo workouts too. We can listen to our own music, move at our own pace and do the exercises we don’t do together (because we know he won’t want to do butterfly crunches or banded hip thrusts or some such exercise).

Plan a program that works so that sometimes you workout together, and other times you get just as much done when your on your own.

Let your partner be a part of these these workouts too. Share your accomplishments. If you’re proud about something you did, tell ’em about it! I bet they are just as enthusiastic (and probably less surprised), about what you achieved.